Let’s be real—asking for help isn’t always easy.
We worry it’ll make us look weak. We think it means we’re not capable enough, smart enough, or strong enough to handle things on our own. But the truth? Asking for help isn’t a sign of weakness—it’s a sign of self-awareness.
The most successful people in the world aren’t lone warriors. They ask for guidance, support, and collaboration when needed. The key is to ask the right way—in a way that feels confident, respectful, and professional.
Here are 10 ways to ask for help that don’t make you feel incompetent—but instead, show that you’re proactive, thoughtful, and willing to grow.
1. “I could use your perspective on this—what do you think?”
Instead of framing it as “I don’t know what to do”, frame it as “I value your insight.” This makes the conversation feel like a collaboration rather than a plea for help.
Why it works:
- It makes the other person feel valued.
- It shifts the dynamic from seeking help to seeking input.
Example:
- “I could use your perspective on how to approach this client issue—what do you think?”
2. “I’ve taken it as far as I can—can I get your input on the next step?”
This shows that you’ve put in the effort before asking for help. It reassures the other person that you’re not just offloading your work onto them—you’re genuinely seeking their expertise.
Why it works:
- It shows that you’ve done your part first.
- It makes your request more focused and actionable.
Example:
- “I’ve structured the project outline, but I’m stuck on the timeline. Can I get your input on the next step?”
3. “I want to make sure I’m on the right track—does this look good to you?”
People are more comfortable offering feedback than fixing something for you. This phrase allows them to guide you rather than take over.
Why it works:
- It makes your request feel more like a quality check than a rescue mission.
- It shows that you take responsibility for your work.
Example:
- “I want to make sure I’m on the right track with this report—does this look good to you?”
4. “Would you mind sharing how you approached this when you handled it?”
Instead of just asking what to do, ask how they did it. People love sharing their experiences, and this approach helps you learn without feeling like you’re just asking for a shortcut.
Why it works:
- It turns your request into a conversation about learning.
- It makes the other person feel valued for their experience.
Example:
- “I know you’ve done similar presentations before—would you mind sharing how you approached it?”
5. “I’ve run into a challenge with [specific issue]—do you have any suggestions?”
Vague requests for help can feel overwhelming to the other person. Being specific about your challenge makes it easier for them to offer useful advice without taking over the whole project.
Why it works:
- It shows that you’ve identified the problem before asking for help.
- It allows the other person to give targeted, efficient guidance.
Example:
- “I’ve run into a challenge with prioritizing these tasks—do you have any suggestions?”
6. “I’m trying to get better at [skill]. Can you show me how you do it?”
This approach makes your request about growth rather than just solving a problem. It also flatters the person you’re asking because it implies they’re skilled at something.
Why it works:
- It frames your request as a learning opportunity, not a burden.
- It shows that you respect their expertise.
Example:
- “I’m trying to get better at structuring emails. Can you show me how you do it?”
7. “Can we brainstorm some ideas together?”
Sometimes, you don’t need someone to give you the answer—you just need a thought partner. This phrase makes your request feel like a two-way conversation.
Why it works:
- It creates a sense of collaboration rather than dependency.
- It makes the other person feel like their ideas are valued.
Example:
- “I’m stuck on this campaign concept—can we brainstorm some ideas together?”
8. “I could use a second set of eyes on this—do you see anything I’m missing?”
This phrase makes it clear that you’ve done the work already, but you want a fresh perspective. It’s a great way to ask for help without making it seem like you need someone else to do the work for you.
Why it works:
- It reassures the other person that you’re not asking them to take over.
- It makes them feel like a valuable contributor.
Example:
- “I could use a second set of eyes on this proposal—do you see anything I’m missing?”
9. “I want to improve in this area—do you have any advice?”
Sometimes, asking for help isn’t about fixing a problem but growing in a skill. Framing it this way makes you seem proactive rather than dependent.
Why it works:
- It positions you as someone who is actively working on self-improvement.
- It invites mentorship rather than just problem-solving.
Example:
- “I want to improve in handling difficult conversations—do you have any advice?”
10. “If you were in my position, how would you handle this?”
This is a powerful way to ask for help because it invites the other person to share their thought process instead of just giving you an answer. It makes them feel like a mentor, not just a problem-solver.
Why it works:
- It encourages a deeper conversation rather than a quick fix.
- It allows the other person to offer insights without feeling pressured to solve the problem for you.
Example:
- “If you were in my position, how would you handle this client request?”
Final Thoughts: Asking for Help is a Strength, Not a Weakness
We often think that asking for help makes us look incompetent, but the reality is—strong people ask for help all the time. The difference is in how they ask.
The best way to seek help is to:
✅ Be specific about what you need.
✅ Show that you’ve put in effort first.
✅ Make the other person feel valued for their expertise.
So next time you need help, don’t hesitate. Ask with confidence. Ask with purpose. Because real strength isn’t in knowing everything—it’s in knowing when to ask.