We’ve all been on one side or the other—either asking for advice or being asked for it. And while “Can I pick your brain?” is a common way to request someone’s insights, it often sounds… well, transactional.
Think about it—picking someone’s brain makes it seem like you’re just extracting knowledge, rather than engaging in a mutually beneficial conversation. If you truly value someone’s time and expertise, it’s better to ask in a way that shows respect, purpose, and appreciation.
Here are 11 better ways to request advice or insights—ones that sound professional, thoughtful, and more likely to get a positive response.
1. “I really admire your expertise in [topic]. Would you be open to a quick conversation about it?”
Flattery? No. Genuine appreciation? Yes. People like to know that their knowledge is valued. Acknowledging their expertise makes your request feel like a compliment rather than a demand.
Why it works:
- It makes the person feel recognized and appreciated.
- It shows that you respect their time by keeping it “quick.”
Example:
- “I really admire your expertise in UX design. Would you be open to a quick conversation about career transitions in this field?”
2. “I’d love to get your insights on [specific topic]. Could we set up a brief chat?”
Instead of a vague brain-picking, be clear about what you need. The phrase “brief chat” reassures them that you’re not asking for an hour-long deep dive.
Why it works:
- It makes the request specific and easy to say yes to.
- It respects their time by setting clear expectations.
Example:
- “I’d love to get your insights on how you approached funding your startup. Could we set up a brief chat?”
3. “Would you be open to a 15-minute call? I have a specific question about [topic].”
If you want someone to say yes, make it easy. A time-bound request (like 15 minutes) makes it clear that you’re mindful of their schedule.
Why it works:
- It reassures them that you’re not asking for a huge time commitment.
- It positions your request as focused and to the point.
Example:
- “Would you be open to a 15-minute call? I have a specific question about transitioning into product management.”
4. “I know you’re busy, so even a quick email reply would be really helpful.”
Sometimes, a full conversation isn’t necessary. If your question can be answered via email, offer that as an option—it’s often easier for busy professionals.
Why it works:
- It gives them control over how they respond.
- It removes the pressure of scheduling a call.
Example:
- “I know you’re busy, so even a quick email reply would be really helpful. What’s one thing you wish you knew before becoming a freelancer?”
5. “I’m navigating [situation], and I’d really appreciate your perspective. Would you be available for a quick chat?”
This approach personalizes your request. Instead of just asking for general wisdom, you’re inviting them to help with a real challenge you’re facing.
Why it works:
- It makes the conversation feel more meaningful.
- It taps into the human instinct to help others in real situations.
Example:
- “I’m navigating my first big leadership role, and I’d really appreciate your perspective. Would you be available for a quick chat?”
6. “I respect your work in [field], and I’d love to hear how you approached [specific challenge].”
Instead of just saying “Can I get your advice?”, frame it around something they’ve done well. This makes it feel less like a request and more like an opportunity for them to share their experience.
Why it works:
- It feels more like a conversation than an obligation.
- It makes them feel like a mentor, not just a knowledge bank.
Example:
- “I respect your work in marketing, and I’d love to hear how you approached scaling your brand in the early days.”
7. “I saw your work on [project], and it really resonated with me. Could I ask you a quick question about it?”
People love knowing that their work has made an impact. If you reference something specific they’ve done, your request feels more personal and engaging.
Why it works:
- It makes the request feel personalized rather than generic.
- It flatters them in a way that feels natural.
Example:
- “I saw your TED Talk on leadership, and it really resonated with me. Could I ask you a quick question about your approach?”
8. “I’m facing [specific challenge], and I’d love to hear how you handled something similar.”
Instead of making a broad request for advice, position your question around a shared experience. It makes the conversation feel relevant and natural.
Why it works:
- It creates a sense of connection by showing you value their past experiences.
- It makes the question feel like a discussion rather than a one-way ask.
Example:
- “I’m facing my first big product launch, and I’d love to hear how you handled something similar.”
9. “Would you be willing to share your top 3 insights on [topic]?”
People are more likely to say yes when they know exactly what’s expected. Limiting the request to three key takeaways makes it digestible and easier to respond to.
Why it works:
- It makes the request focused and easy to fulfill.
- It respects their time while still getting valuable input.
Example:
- “Would you be willing to share your top 3 insights on building a strong remote team?”
10. “I value your perspective on [topic]. Could I buy you a coffee and get your thoughts?”
This is a classic, but it still works—especially in in-person settings. Offering to buy someone coffee is a small gesture that makes the request feel more like a mutual exchange.
Why it works:
- It feels casual and inviting rather than like a formal ask.
- It shows appreciation for their time in advance.
Example:
- “I value your perspective on writing professionally. Could I buy you a coffee and get your thoughts?”
11. “Would you be open to a quick exchange? I’d love to hear your thoughts on [topic].”
Sometimes, people don’t want a full meeting, but they’re open to a quick back-and-forth conversation. This phrase keeps things light and low-pressure.
Why it works:
- It feels more like a collaboration than a request.
- It gives them flexibility in how they respond.
Example:
- “Would you be open to a quick exchange? I’d love to hear your thoughts on transitioning from academia to industry.”
Final Thoughts: Make It Easy to Say Yes
When you ask someone for their time and insights, you’re not just asking for knowledge—you’re asking for their energy, focus, and effort.
The key to a good request? Make it specific, respectful, and easy to say yes to.
So, next time you want to “pick someone’s brain,” choose a phrase that values their time, their expertise, and their generosity.
Because when people feel appreciated, they’re far more likely to share what they know.